nightly thoughts during a break at work
Have you ever had the feeling that you are inwardly being torn to pieces because your mind is spinning all the time and your emotions can't keep up? I guess you have, most people have gone through it. I'm sick and tired of it. I keep telling myself: Breathe. Thank God. Say thankyou every time it feels like you are going to freak. Just relax.
But I just really feel unsuficiant. liek I'm not enough. Like I would be happy if only... that friend was here, or if that person could visit me, or that bill was paid, or this... Always one more "if" until I'm happy. And all the time this feeling like it's all a part of God's glorious growth plan for my life... It kind of sucks feeling that every little low and every freak out party is actually just a part of God's plan to purify and mature you. Couldn't life just be sucky without purpose for once? I can't believe I just said that, because if I believed it, that ther couldn't come anything good out of the bad, then my life would feel very, very pointless...
But I just really feel unsuficiant. liek I'm not enough. Like I would be happy if only... that friend was here, or if that person could visit me, or that bill was paid, or this... Always one more "if" until I'm happy. And all the time this feeling like it's all a part of God's glorious growth plan for my life... It kind of sucks feeling that every little low and every freak out party is actually just a part of God's plan to purify and mature you. Couldn't life just be sucky without purpose for once? I can't believe I just said that, because if I believed it, that ther couldn't come anything good out of the bad, then my life would feel very, very pointless...
posted by wild rose pilgrim at 2:03 PM
3 Comments:
I asked my mother once "Does life get less easier to understand when you get older?" Her reply: "No, you just worry about it less."
Ups don't exist without downs, and life doesn't exist without soul-shaking challenges.
hey erikka, cant find your e-mail right now, so Ill just post this thing here :) sorry :)
just for you to pray about, if maybe :)
we talked with a friend of mine that we are going to have somekind of connect nordic gathering in turku this spring. dont know if you have heard of this network called connect europe (www.connet-europe.org)
through that I have got to know some people from norway, and there would maybe three or something people coming over from there.
so we are actually hoping and dreaming, if God could bring some people from sweden and denmark as well.
the connect europe contacts in sweden and denmark are quite small, so all the swedish people I met in dresden came to my mind.
and thought about throwing you something to pray about :)
it looks like the meeting would take place just before easter, or something like that.
we defenitely dont have any programs planned, I think it would just be people hanging out from different countries. getting to know each other and blessing each other. it would be cool to pray for scandinavia together and so on.
the thing is still under prayer, we-ll see what Jesus wants to do with it.
take care sis!
woops, the website is www.connecteurope.org
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